Rock solid

Today I returned to a place that has not changed at all since I went there when I was very small. It fluctuates with the seasons but it's structure and essence remain the same.

This creek has always been a cleansing place for me. I take comfort it it's solidity, feeling my soul settle as I melt against the side of one of it's boulders... The very same boulder that I look at all the time in a snapshot of my best friend and I during the summer before high school. Though I have changed and grown, it appears to have remained the same. This boulder, this creek is dynamic, just with a different sense of time than I have.

Why is stability so comforting? My soul aches to follow Jesus, to find a call befitting that path, but it is not a path of stabilty. My life is more likely to be like a stick that drifts past the boulder, pausing in pools, rushing over rapids, careening past drops, than the boulder itself. My savior is one who had no place to lay his head. He was a sojourner who carried what he needed with him in his heart.

I fear needing to do the same. I thrive on change yet am driven to anxiety by it at the same time. This life I am called to may be nothing like what I imagined, but the hope of the calling is that through true disciplship, it will be richer than I could gave imagined. Those shifting sands may be nothing like the boulder my soul calls for, but one day I may learn to find the same comfort there that my boulder provides.